We’re still blasting through forms including creating a really cool robopuppy today. Definitely the comfort level is going up as we settle into our new (well only slightly) roles. We’re both realising how comfortable and natural this is, and we’re both learning things about ourselves in the process.

Miss Tara shared an amazing quote with me the other day:

“A slave is a man or woman who has a special heart – a heart that requires a connection with another person in order to find completeness in their life.  A person is born with a slave heart – he cannot be ‘made’ into a slave, nor can wishing to be one bring it about. It is a natural state.  A slave may actualize their destiny by choosing to live in obedience to another person’s will and to serve that person – their Master or Mistress – in obedience. Most slaves are very bright and capable, and they may make many decisions every day affecting other people, large sums of money, important projects and so on. But slaves generally do not make decisions easily or well that concern themselves, and that is one of the reasons they seek a Master – to form that point of centered-ness form which to live their lives.”
- Protocol Handbook for the Leather Slave: Theory and Practice, by Robert J. Rubel, PhD

The latter part of that quote really struck me. It describes me thoroughly. I’m great at looking after other people, definitely good at making important decisions about others, and really not good at making decisions for myself. I never would have considered myself as a slave at heart. A submissive, a bottom, certainly. A slave, seriously? But the more I think about it, the more I realise that this what I crave: relief from the responsibilities of daily life, which frankly are crushing at times, if only for the time I’m in SL.

Miss Tara made a similar breakthrough recently with her own Master. It caught her as by surprise as it has taken me. So now we have a slave who owns a slave… With her permission:

[2010-01-01 11:28:45]  Corvan Nansen: Will you accept me in my slave nature, given RL, and all the rest? Is that going to be workable for you, to own me much as Hrolf owns you?
[2010-01-01 11:29:12]  Tara Reardon: Absolutely.  There’s no doubt in my mind.
[2010-01-01 11:29:31]  Tara Reardon: Whatever predefined labels people put on us are useless.  We are what we are.
[2010-01-01 11:29:49]  Corvan Nansen: I’m not the sub I thought I was, I knew it ran deep, but the depth is turning out far _far deeper than I’d ever imagined. It scares me a little at times.
[2010-01-01 11:29:54]  Tara Reardon: Master SAID you could be mine.  Therefore, I have the right and responsibility to own you, outright.
[2010-01-01 11:30:10]  Tara Reardon: Don’t let it scare you, if you can help it.
[2010-01-01 11:30:13]  Tara Reardon: Succumb to it.
[2010-01-01 11:30:22]  Tara Reardon: Be what you are, mine.  I don’t only ask that of you, I demand it.
[2010-01-01 11:31:08]  Corvan Nansen: With you to catch me when I fall, with you holding gently yet firmly to my leash, I can. I definitely can.
[2010-01-01 11:31:17]  Corvan Nansen: I am yours
[2010-01-01 11:31:36]  Tara Reardon: I’m going to be there, every step of the way.
[2010-01-01 11:31:41]  Tara Reardon: Mine.
[2010-01-01 11:31:48]  Tara Reardon: Let me ask you a serious question.
[2010-01-01 11:31:52]  Corvan Nansen: Anything
[2010-01-01 11:32:04]  Tara Reardon: Can you get what you need from a slave?
[2010-01-01 11:32:23]  Corvan Nansen: May I rephrase that question slightly, Miss?
[2010-01-01 11:32:45]  Tara Reardon: Yes.
[2010-01-01 11:33:10]  Corvan Nansen: Given “[11:29:31]  Tara Reardon: Whatever predefined labels people put on us are useless.  We are what we are.” I would rephrase that as: Can I get what I need from you?
[2010-01-01 11:33:32]  Corvan Nansen: Unquestionably, undeniably, absolutely: Yes. Because I already do.

There is no question in my mind, there is no doubt. I am Tara Reardon’s slave. It’s been a long journey arriving at this point, and it’s a nice coincidence that I really and truly arrive here on the eve of my first Rez Day in SecondLife. I can’t wait to see where my second year takes me, but there is one thing I know: It takes me where Miss Tara leads me, and I couldn’t be happier.

Related posts:

1. On life in SecondLife…
2. Where is that line anyway?
3. A rough day RL, a sweet day SL
4. Don’t tell me that SecondLife is just a game
5. Thoughts on labels

2 Responses

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1. 

   Tara Reardon

   Mine, dammit. MINE.

   January 4, 2010 at 13:15
2. 

   corvan

   Yours my Miss, YOURS.

   January 4, 2010 at 14:48